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How many dates should you wait to have sex? When to put out has been debated for years, and the ever-changing number always feels like it's somewhat rooted in a mixture of misogyny and personal best practices. Growing up, I remember watching countless movies that preached waiting was the way to go if you wanted to keep a man interested or else he'll think you're too easy and move on. Friends with Benefits with Mila Kunis and Justin Timberlake showcased casual sex with boundaries in , but when she wanted something serious with a guy, she made him wait multiple dates for sex spoiler alert, it didn't work out for her.
Every rom-com I can remember growing up had a perfect number and formula of how long to wait to get the guy which is pretty heteronormative and a little slut shame-y if you ask me. I remember when I was younger, I waited months to tell my friends I had slept with my boyfriend because I was worried I didn't wait long enough at the time.
These days media is a bit more forgiving when it comes to sex, with sex-positive TV shows like Sex Education on Netflix that showcase teens and adults exploring sexuality with an array of queer and straight couples, all with different journeys.
But that doesn't mean Gen-Z and Millennials didn't grow up seeped in purity culture, thinking that there was a perfect number to wait. So what do people do now? Is it a free-for-all all? Are people still waiting for the third or fifth date?
