All products are independently selected by our editors. If you buy something, we may earn an affiliate commission. It happens! For some people, however, those one-off mild or even intense! Left unaddressed, you can grow to straight-up resent your partner and end up scoffing at every teeny tiny thing they do. Below, Basulto unpacks why you may be so exasperated with your other halfβand suggests some practical strategies for reining in your frustration.
Then, you may wind up getting irked by everything your partner does the way they eat chips, for example, or how loudly they speak , when, really, these little behaviors have absolutely nothing to do with the core issues at hand.
As a result, you might wind up blaming your partner for these perceived shortcomings, she adds. Basulto recommends making a pros and cons list about them that they will never, ever find, of course. Jot down what you appreciate about this person along with the behaviors that set you off. Even though your brain may be wired to fixate on the problems in the relationship, you might find that the good outweighs the bad.
Clear, open communication is, according to research and countless self-help books, the key to happy and healthy relationships. Again, relationship issues tend to intensify over time if you suppress themβthose hard feelings can build into resentment and then, in a month or two, you blow up over the pile of crumpled cash on the table or the way your partner clears their throat.
For example, say your partner shows they care by walking the dog or cooking dinner, but what you need to feel loved is for them to make a point to cuddle more or hang out one-on-one at night. Plus understanding how they express love can help you find new ways to connect, potentially rekindling that spark that united you in the first place, she adds.
